Well we've figured out who this Captain Brownstar guy is. Turns out he's also got an eye for the critical problems of today. Such a keen eye has he, that we've decided to commision him as a guest columnest here.
Captain Brownstar's Log, 03 March 04:
I feel like Office Space missed one big part of working in your typical "cube-farm" office: Muzak.
Take right now for instance, I'm being motivated to work harder by an instrumental version of Mike and the Mechanics "Can You Hear Me Running?". Christ. Like I didn't have to take a shit bad enough already.
I've also realized that nothing makes me want to fill my ears with concrete more than hearing the Muzak version of "Solsbury Hill".
I don't understand why there is such a big deal about gays getting married. You want to know what's really ripping apart the fabric of our society? Come take a listen. |